e-Dating Insight

Dating in my 50s is certainly different than it was when I was a college co-ed.  On a very basic level, the old conversation starters: "What is your sign?" "What's your major?"  no longer work. 

Also I realize that when I was younger, having a romantic someone (anyone) was tremendously important to me.  I avoided a solitary life at any cost. And when I did have a partner, I let go of who I was as a person and molded my life to fit his. (Certainly not something I'm proud to admit...but it's true.)  This has changed... I'm happy to say.

Today I've made peace with my independence.  I've found it empowering to do more and more things for myself.  Creating a rich life has put me in a better position to be a good companion for someone else.

I no longer look to a partner to meet all my needs.  I realize that that was asking the impossible. I want a life filled with female and male  friends who value themselves as whole, worthwhile people whether they have a romantic companion or not.  I want a life that includes family, work activities, as well as creative endeavors.

I want dating to be just one way to enhance my life.  I now look at dates not as an interview in search for Mr. Right, but instead as a chance to share new adventures and have some insightful conversation... a way to connect with another human to share beliefs, ideas, creativity ...and maybe in the end to sigh and know that my life is just a little better because of this experience.

Someone asked me recently to relate to her some of the really awful dating experiences I'd had.  I couldn't think of any.  The only bad date or relationship is one where I didn't grow or learn.

 It may sound strange coming from an Internet Dating Coach, but I also believe in casting a wide net.  I definitely do internet dating, but I also belong to social clubs where I can make friends, go dancing, eat out, go to movies and just have fun together with other singles in my age group. 

My goal isn't on hunting down Mr. Right, although I do hope for a long term relationship one day.  In the meantime, my goal is on having fun being comfortable with myself as I interact with other people.  With that goal, I can embrace authentic success on a regular basis.

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